{PHOTO VIA: dkidiscussion.blogspot.com]

Let’s face it, kiddos ages 2-4 love what is theirs and do not like to share. And more so, girls just sometimes don’t want everyone else to even LIKE what they like. For example Alice could say, “My favorite color is pink!”, and June replies loudly, “No! MY favorite color is pink!” and the argument can go on for minutes at a time! {and nobody likes to hear two kids arguing…} Here is a possible solution for helping kids to share and compromise!

• If you notice your child is taking things from other children often, then try having him/her play something with another child, such as a puzzle. Something that they both have to work on together AND share or else it will be put up.
• In a situation where a child has taken a toy from another, simply get on his/her level, make eye contact and ask if that was nice or if that was a good choice. Children even at such young ages DO know right from wrong but sometimes we have to remind them. Sharing is something that takes LOTS of practice and is time consuming and repetitive for the parent! They will not learn to share over night {wouldn’t it be wonderful if they did!} but once they reach the point where you see them give a toy to another child, PRAISE them!!! If we praise them when they DO share, then most often, they will begin to share more!
• Also another EXTREMELY important tip… No matter how awful of an act your child might commit do NOT tell your child that they are BAD. In studies at the Applebaum conferences I learned that telling your child that he/she IS bad will inevitably make them think that they are bad. If they think they are bad then in time they will choose to make bad choices. Shouting out, “BAD!” or “BAD, JIMMY!” can make your child define themselves as a bad person. We are constantly telling children “use your words”, well now, mom and dad, WE have to! Choose your words carefully, as in, “was that very nice?” or “no jack! That was NOT a good choice!” Never tell any child that they are bad, because how can something so wonderful, be defined as something so, “BAD”?

Stay strong and keep in mind everything we say and teach them does influence in some way!

{Note: The children’’s names and places of these events are fictional due to the privacy of the child and family that I have used these methods with. All scenarios are ones I have personally been involved in and all the suggestions are also ones I have personally used.}